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Driving Miss D.J.
Driving Miss D.J. is episode twenty in season five of Full House. It originally aired on February 25, 1992. Opening Teaser Joey is in his room, but he can't seem to find his other shoe. Mr. Woodchuck is also seen just as Michelle enters, and she says "hi" to Mr. Woodchuck and wishes he were real; at which point Joey does his Mr. Woodchuck impression on camera. However, she isn't fooled by Mr. Woodchuck "talking" without Joey, at which point she busts him. When he realizes that it was indeed him, all she can say is "Duh!", at which point he mimics her and has a little fun with her. Synopsis D.J. now has her learner's permit, and she is eager to learn how to drive. When Danny tries to teach D.J. how to drive, he makes her even more nervous than she already is with the way he gives instructions, and by being overprotective. She turns on the radio to learn how to drive with music, but he does not let her, saying that he wants her to drive like him. He claims that she is being too emotional, so he says to switch places, but she just goes to the back seat and they head home. Meanwhile, Becky prepares to take the twins' first portraits, Jesse has them dressed in doo rags – like himself. She goes along with it, but when Danny and D.J. come home arguing and Jesse leaves to be the peacemaker, it is her chance to ditch the rags. Elsewhere, with Michelle bugging her constantly when she has friends over, Stephanie starts to feel exactly the same irritation that D.J. felt when she and D.J. were roommates, and as a result, she resorts to drastic measures; though unlike D.J., Stephanie has no rules regarding Michelle touching her stuff or even if and when she can be on Stephanie's side of the room; though like always, the one rule is that whenever Stephanie's around Michelle, she is the older sister, and thus, "the boss". Through the use of the "Hairy Scary Monster", which Stephanie had threatened to summon by saying his name three times if Michelle did not stop bugging her, Joey helps Michelle realize that she must stop annoying Stephanie whenever she has friends over and has to go somewhere else to play (see Quotes). Out on the road, as Jesse tries to teach D.J. with his Mustang, he tells her to "feel the vibrations", but she feels them a little too much and accidentally puts a scratch on the side (see Quotes), and apologizes to him for the damage. Back home, Danny is watching a movie on TV that involves cars being driven recklessly fast, which is not what he wants to see right now and shuts it off. When the guys finally realize how helpless they are making D.J. feel by complicating her efforts to learn how to drive, they finally find the strength to let go and help D.J. do her learning in peace. Kimmy comes by, telling D.J. that she took the learner's permit test and passed it – by reading the manual and doing what it says. Danny insists the way he teaches is to protect her, but he wants her to understand there are bad drivers out there. She asks him if she should ride a bike or a horse the rest of her life, and insists he let go. Jesse also feels the same way, and they decide to take turns teaching her: Danny promising not to be so tense, and Jesse promising not to be so laid back. Then, for the first time, Danny and Jesse are in Danny's car with D.J. She is in the driver's seat, with Danny next to her, and Jesse in the back. They are arguing over how she should drive, but then she uses the method normally used by parents to stop commotions, warning them that if they do not stop arguing, she will turn the car around and head home. They stop, and soon they are off (as the inspirational music plays). This time when she asks to turn on the radio again, both Danny and Jesse tell her not to (see Quotes). They ride off into the sunset (as the audience applauds and the EP credits appear). Quotes [Jesse and Becky are humming the theme song as they bounce each twin on their knee.] Jesse: stop. an "old west" voice: Alright, now remember cowkids, it's a very important code of the West: Always keep your saddles dry now, ya hear? ---- stressed Danny returns from the DMV. Danny: sighs Hey, Jess. Jesse: Hey, how'd it go? Did D.J. get her learner's permit? Danny: It was a nightmare. Jesse: She flunked? Danny: Worse... an excited D.J. runs in, with her not-so-excited best friend following. D.J.: I passed! Jesse: Alright, Deej! runs over and kisses her. Kimmy: angrily I failed! I don't get it. I copied every one of D.J.'s answers and I still flunked the test. Jesse: Kimmy, they give everyone different tests so no one can cheat. Kimmy: They do? Jesse: Uh-huh. Kimmy: That's what's wrong with the world today; no one trusts anyone. Bye. D.J.: Bye. ---- Michelle about the Hairy Scary Monster: Is he nice like the ? Stephanie: Are you kidding? He scares the Cookie Monster. Because he's the Hairy Scary Monster. ---- Danny: Hello? Yeah, Governor Wilson's office? Yes, hi. Danny Tanner here, concerned citizen. Yeah, I was just wondering: is there any way we can raise the driving age to 35? ---- summons the Hairy Scary Monster in an attempt to get Michelle out of the room. When the monster (Joey) appears, Stephanie screams and runs under Michelle's bed and her friend Rita runs into the closet. Michelle: smiling Thank you, Joey. Joey: the mask You're very welcome, Michelle. high-five each other. Stephanie: from under the bed Joey, we knew it was you all along. Right, Rita? Rita: folding her arms as she emerges from the closet Heck, no! Joey: serious OK. Now, look. You guys are all even now, OK? So, let's call a little truce. Steph, no more scaring Michelle. Michelle, when Stephanie's in here with her friends, you gotta give her some space lesson learned by Stephanie herself in "[[Take My Sister, Please]"]. Deal? The roommates: Deal. shake hands. ---- Jesse: D.J. scratches "Mustang Sally" It's just a c-c-c-car. ---- Danny, and Jesse are in Danny's car. Jesse: Deej, whatever you do, don't use the "feel it" method. Just pull out and take it nice and easy. Danny: Yeah, but not too easy. You have to drive defensively. Jesse: Yeah, but you don't wanna be too uptight. Danny: You calling me uptight? Jesse: Uptight, paranoid, whatever. Danny: Oh, I'm paranoid? I care about my daughter. Jesse: I understand that. argue, and D.J. threatens them... D.J.: Hey, if you boys don't behave, I will turn this car right around and go straight home. Danny & Jesse: Sorry. D.J.: the camera cuts to a wide shot OK, signal. Check my mirrors. Look over my shoulder and pull out into traffic for the very first time. I'm really driving. I love it. Jesse: She's pretty good, huh, Danny? Danny: Yeah, I'm feeling good about this. D.J.: Can I turn on the radio? Danny & Jesse: No! Trivia * The episode title is a take on the title of the 1989 Oscar-winning film . * Jesse named his Mustang "Sally" after the 1966 hit " ". * D.J. mentioning if she should ride a horse the rest of her life was likely a reference to "D.J.'s Very First Horse" (Season 2). Category:Season 5 Category:Episodes Category:Trivia